Ten Things to Buy to Pacify the Angry Book Lover

What happens when you accidentally end up making the book lover in your life mad?

Well, it can get pretty scary.  I mean, just think about it.  With all the books that we read, we have quite the arsenal to use against you.  We can shout a ton of strange and powerful profanities at you that we learned from reading our books.  We can use fighting skills we’ve picked up from reading so many fight scenes.  And if all else fails, we can take the extra large hardcovers off our shelves and hit you with them.

You think I’m joking?  Look at these monsters.  They’re weapons.  ( Yes I have two of them. )

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However you managed to get out of our good graces, I’m betting you’re going to want to get back in them, especially after picturing being hit on the head with one of those giant dictionaries.  So, as a bona fide book lover myself, I’m here to help you do just that, by giving you advice straight from the horse’s mouth.

The best way to make us book lovers happy again: buy us a gift.

But wait!  It’s actually a bit more complicated than that.  It can’t be just any gift; it has to be something related to books or reading.  And this doesn’t mean just buying new books either.  Oh no, there is much more you can get us bookish people that will make us happy again.  Or at least get you back on track with our good graces.

Thanks to the TTT, I have been given the perfect opportunity to make a gift buying list for you.  So read carefully; this list might just save your life.

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The Gifts

Books

Because we can never have too many books.  This the default gift to get when either you can’t get to one of the other gifts or aren’t sure which one of them will work best.  It’s a pretty safe bet to get a book.  You almost can’t go wrong.  One word of advice for picking out a book, though; look at our shelves.  Pay attention to what we read.  Make sure that if your book lover is always reading non-fiction, you don’t buy them a western.

Cash

If you can’t decide what book to get your book lover, or if you’re just afraid of the retribution of getting the wrong sort of book, then a good default is to take out some cash ( enough for a book or two ) and offer to drive your book lover to a book store of their choice with the express intent of using that cash to buy more books.

Tea and Snacks

Or coffee and snacks.  Or soda water and snacks.  Basically, you just need to know what your book lover’s favorite drink is, get it for them, and pair it with a snack.  This snack should be something sweet.  Note: the sweetness is not mandatory, but I would like to point out that bringing an angry person dessert is never a bad idea.  Just be careful that it’s not a sticky dessert.  If it gets our book pages dirty, we’ll be more mad at you then we were before.

Bookmarks

Think of the D&D player who always collecting new dice, despite already having over 700 of them in a drawstring bag.  This is the book lover with their bookmarks.  We can never have enough of them, and we’ll always need more.  Just like the D&D player saying they need just the right colored dice for each of their different characters, the book lover also needs just the right bookmark to go with each book they read.

Pillows and Blankets

If you can’t find the right book for your book lover to read, then the next best thing is getting us soft and comfy things we can use to build the perfect reading nest.  You might even be so bold as to offer to help build the said reading nest.  Once you have your book lover tucked quietly away reading their book in a comfy nest, back away slowly, and do not bother them unless they call for snacks.

Socks

Socks might not be the first thing to jump to your mind when you think of things to buy a book lover, but they are good for two reasons.  1) They keep our feet warm while we sit and read, because getting cold toes the worst.  2) We can use pretty new socks for Sock Sundays posts on Bookstagram.  And that is always a good thing.  So make sure that they’re pretty socks, not plain socks.

Photo Props

This one might seem even stranger than the socks; to most people this doesn’t go with books or reading at all.  But going back to the Bookstagram posts, it actually does.  We will always want more pretty things to place in our bookish photos for Bookstagram.  So buying us pretty things to go with our book photos is always a good idea; as long as you know what sort of odds and ends make your book lover happy.

Tote Bags

Now this doesn’t have to be tote bags especially; any bag that is super large and has handles that are strong enough to, well, handle the heavy weight of at least a dozen books will do.  A book lover’s greatest challenge is going to either the book store or the library, getting armfuls of books that they need, and then realizing that they have no way to carry all those books properly.  This is where large, strong bags come into play.

Audiobooks

If for some reason you have been unable to pacify your book lover up until this point ( I mean wow I don’t know what you did but it must have been really bad ), and on top of that you are going to be stuck in a car with them for hours on end while they are still mad at you, then save yourself.  Get an audiobook.  A book lover will not interrupt a good story they are listening to just so they can yell at you; they’ll wait until the story is done and then start yelling.  So depending on how long your trip is, you might want to bring more than one audiobook.

Dictionaries

If you are reading this then time is the only thing that is going to save you.  All else has failed, and now you simply have to wait for your book lover to stop being mad at you.  But there is something you can do to soften the blow while you wait.

 Get your book lover a dictionary to feed all their word cravings.  This might not work to make them happier with you, but they will at least be spending most of their time looking up new words to insult you with rather than actually yelling at you; and when they do finally find time to yell at you, it will be with so many new and large words that you won’t be able to understand them anyways.

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So there it is, my friends.  The gift guide to getting back on the good side of your book lover.  If you want my advice though; don’t make us mad to begin with.

Em

Let’s Chat!

How do you think my list adds up?  If you are bookish, would any of these things make you less angry if they were bought for you?  If you are not bookish, does this help you figure out what to do to make the scary book lover you’re afraid of turn back into the cuddly book lover you know and love?  What else would you add to my list?  Oh, and link me to your TTT in your comment!

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13 responses to “Ten Things to Buy to Pacify the Angry Book Lover

  1. I would definitely love books for Christmas! My family NEVER buys me books because they don’t know what to get me on their own (because of the blog they don’t want to get me something that hasn’t had good things said about it in the community) However I do love cash or better yet gift certificates or gift cards to bookstores. Especially used book stores. I’m with you on the tea and snacks though. A Hangry reader is worse than an angry reader.
    Here’s my Top 10 Tuesday post

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